Middle Aged Woman Yells at Clouds

First and foremost, I included SO MANY Links 4 U this month because it’s nice to be reminded occasionally that the internet can be Good, Actually. I hope you can find at least one Link that calls out to you.

Speaking of calling, I had THREE actual phone conversations this month and didn’t hate it???! I left each phone call feeling better than I started them because hi duh it’s nice to talk to people you care about. Maybe in this age of moving back to dumb technology we try to make phone calls again? Lots of question marks on that one, but I’m open to further research. The idea of moving back to non-smart, non-AI invaded forms of all kinds of things are starting to come back into fashion. We talk all the time about how much we loath AI, so perhaps it’s time to try something new and say hello and i love you to the people closest to you with your actual voice. 

Per the usual we've included things coming in the upcoming month, and a look at what's happening on our Patreon (which you can join for ~as little as a dollar~) & Discord which is open to all!

We return, once again, to the feelings:

STELLA:

All I do is read. So you know. It’s gonna be books. But it’s gay books! Happy Pride!

My favs from my own shelf:

• Faggots and Their Friends Between Revolutions by Larry Mitchell with Ned Astra.

  • Talk about a time capsule! A beautiful poetic piece that I found really inspiring and hopeful. Also, frankly, nice to read a book by a gay man that actually likes women. 

• Late Bloomer by Mazey Eddings 

  • A great sapphic romance. Forget there was only one bed - there was only one flower farm! 

• Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of the Matrix by Tilly Bridges 

  • Exactly what it sounds like. Had no relationship to these movies before and really enjoyed watching them then reading the essays. Matrix Resurrections is a good movie! 

Bought this month:

• Of Monsters and Mainframes by Barbra Truelove 

  • Truly what a unique book. Spaceships and universal monsters? It’s so fun! 

• Something That May Shock & Discredit You by Daniel M Lavery 

  • A fantastic semi-memoir/essay collection. The narrative plays with form so much and has everything from Marcus Aurelius to Mean Girls. Though Obvs the best chapter is “Captain Kirk is a Beautiful Lesbian” 

Also this music video by Bob The Drag Queen rips.

ERIN:

Book thoughts (i have book thoughts again!! So exciting!): 

I read Like, Follow, Subscribe: Influencer Kids and the Cost of a Childhood Online and really enjoyed it. Okay… maybe “enjoy” is not the right choice for a subject this dark, but I liked the way it was written and presented. I felt like she actually went into the world of family sharenting with an open mind and it showed in the expansive way she questioned her subjects. Also, this is a great pair with Yesteryear.

You may recall two months ago when Stella said she hated the book Tacky? Well I read it thinking that if I go in knowing the general structure I might like it more than she did - NOPE. BIG MISTAKE. HUGE. (is Pretty Woman too obscure of a reference now?? Oh well!)  I, too, hated the back half of it. The worst part really was that the first half was great and dealt with interpersonal, non romantic relationships in a way I really liked, but she totally abandons the premise and stops explaining why she thinks something is Tacky in the back half. Ultimately I also hated how she included things that were very much cringe or camp, totally different categories of audience interactions, as though we should just know why they are “tacky.” It’s a no from me dawg.

ANYWAY BOOK RANT OVER.  

Exciting-- I made a professional goal at work (lol weird that i have a job, right?) to go on a multi day vacation, since it will force me to relinquish control. July is the month I picked and completely loaded it with travel. I’ll be traveling with my kid for his first Amtrak ride, then going to a summer house my parents rented, THEN going to Berlin to cap it off/start August off right. Also, damn, I literally just realized this will also force me to relinquish control of this very newsletter for the end of the month. A good goal I suppose….

Hey, also— It was my birthday this month! 38 is a full nothing of a birthday, but it’s still great because my birthday is on Juneteenth! In school my birthday was always over summer break, and my 6 month was always over winter break, so now having a national holiday fall on the same day feels fantastic. (And legit what a great holiday to share it with.) I felt very loved and supported by my friends and family. Every single message made me feel warm and wonderful. Thank you everyone, i love you.

PRODUCER BOBBY:

I feel like I spoke a lot, and very honestly from the heart, last month about long grief and carrying it. Another weird part of grief is that life doesn’t stop for it. Begin section about pet health, please skip to the end if not the time or place for you. So when this month ended with us learning our 15 year old cat has a tumor in his chest, my partner and I found ourselves just... stuck there. The cat’s still here, forever how long, but that grief is there now and everything else just keeps happening around this bubble. And I was already stuck like two or three griefs back. This will now end that section about that thing. Like Erin, I also have some adventures coming up at the end of this month with Fire In The Mountains happening. Trains and air and distortion and mountains. So expect more about that next month! 

I decided to jump music platforms once again, this time trying out Qobuz. Hi-res focused, with a magazine written by real people and a store where you can purchase real music to own attached to it. Clear stance pushing back against AI, less bells and whistles than more popular platforms, with a surface level focus on Classical and Jazz but the library is actually fairly deep. Yassin bey even saw fit to put “The Ecstatic”, which he previously pulled off all other music platforms, up specifically on Qobuz earlier this month meaning I got to put Casa Bey on my running playlist so that’s all types of positives. I’ll report back if they are secretly evil somehow. 

R E C S 

Movies:

Backrooms, LOVED IT. Obsession, effective at its goals but uses genre to jump some writing gaps. Buying a subscription to a local independent movie theater, RECOMMENDED. 

Music:

I’m behind on all my listening lists but Khemmis and Warning filled my buzzy sad-boy quotient and I missed an Eleni Mandell release at the end of May which is lovely chores music!

Games:

A few of us fell into the early access of Meccha Chameleon, a hide-and-paint-and-seek-with-a-shotgun fun vibe ( as long as you have enough friends to run a private server, the game is popular with streamers so public games draw... that crowd). Up for a game? Let me know on the Discord! And that’s... all the news... there is. 

This month’s Links 4 U:

• Great news about the H-1B visas tax being thrown out by a judge!

• Good article about how to reclaim the government and rise to this political moment 

•  A wonderful piece - A love letter to a life in books, and what drives such a life. (cw: apologies for the substack link, i try to avoid sharing or reading from there but I've made an exception for this one)

• Lesbian nuns quit convent, marry each other

• Essay on Janet Sobel, the woman whose style Jackson Pollock cribbed (of course it was originally from a woman, of course it was)

• Judge tells Trump to get fucked, orders them to reinstall exhibits and signs relating to slavery ​and climate change that it ⁠had removed from ​parks and monuments nationwide

• Silly hats!

• Promises Made, Promises Kept: The Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool Absolutely Looks Like Shit Now

Things coming this month:

• Not Your Demo slowly coming back online. We know it’s been forever, we miss you guys and will be back before you know it. Maybe before you know it isn’t so long…..

• Instagram: @nydproductions you can get show announcements, hilarious clips, a truly unhinged array of reposts, and general revelry. (Upscroll? Erin is squatting her name)

• It’s not a plane, it’s Tumblr!

• Bluesky @nydproductions - seriously how exactly do people want to interact with this platform?

Exclusive to our Patreon (it's only a dollar!) and open for all Discord!

• Join the book club in July! Discord has all the (virtual, do not worry) meetup information!

• Xtras on the Patreon include:

  • All of the Erin’s Not Your Demo After Darks are available 

  • Unofficial Channels archive is there 4 u

  • All the show notes for every episode of X-treks

  • Upcoming projects

And in the Discord, let’s hang out! We’ve got lots of cool little internet rooms.

• The Milk Wars have returned!!

• Weigh in on your rants and raves in the Not Your Demo room 

• Come yell about the Men’s World Cup!

• Listen. Erin knows she’s been lazy as sin on this liveposting fanfic in Stella’s Link Lounge gig, but she’s back, maybe for real this time!, baybeeee! She’s also documenting it on our Instagram highlights. It’s been long enough - she needs weird recommendations! The time has come.

IT’S THE JULY KICKER!